Ha... Une chaîne...
Mais c'est pas la première fois que je la reçoit en plus ! Bon ça va qu'elle est fun...
Tout ceci me donne l'idée d'un article, et si je répondais à ces question existancielles?
Pourquoi ?
Â
La question est fondamentale : POURQUOI ?
On n'a pas souvent l'occasion, en ces temps agités, de se poser les vraies questions.
Et  pourtant...
Â
POURQUOI tu peux avoir une pizza à ta maison plus vite qu'une ambulance ?
Parce que ton pizzayolo est en mobilette et n'a pas 1 tonne de mathos a transporter.
POURQUOI il y a un stationnement pour handicapés en face des patinoires ?
Et si jamais un homme en fauteuil roulant veut faire le guichet, t'as quoi contre ça?
POURQUOI les gens commandent un double cheeseburger, des grosses frites et un coca... light?Â
Parce que figures toi que c'est l'assocition du gras et du sucré qui fait grossir. Sans le sucre du coca® (mais les 10 000 autres produits chimiques) hé bah ça t'évite de grossir.
POURQUOI nous achetons  des saucisses à hot dog en paquet de 10 et des pains à hot dog en paquet de 8 ?
Parce qu'il y a tout un business qui fait que les sociétés de saucisses à hot dog font un profit sur les 2 saucisses vendus en supplément et qui ne servent a rien et qui finirons par donner du travail aux éboueurs.
Par ailleurs, ne t'es-tu jamais demandé...
POURQUOI Les femmes ne peuvent pas se mettre du mascara la bouche fermée?
C'est un nerf psychiédélique qui relie les cils à la bouche et qui fait que celle ci ne peut pas se tenir fermée pendant l'application de mascara.
POURQUOI le mot 'abréviation' est si  long ?
T'as qu'à l'abréger ><
POURQUOI pour arrêter Windows on doit  cliquer sur Démarrer ?
Parce que t'as pas Windows ® Vista™
POURQUOI le jus de  citron est fait de saveurs artificielles et le liquide vaisselle est fait de vrais citrons ?
T'as qu'à les presser toit même si t'es pas content !
POURQUOI il n'y a pas de  nourriture pour chat à saveur de souris ?
Parce que sinon ton chat ne se déchirerais plus à les poursuivre, déjà qu'il dors toute la journée alors là ça serait la fin de sa vie sociale...
POURQUOI ils stérilisent l'aiguille qui sert à l'euthanasie  ?
Qui t'as dit qu'ils le stérilisaient? Les euthanasiés?
Ben les médecins veulent être sur que les patients meurent a cause du produit et pas d'une infection a cause de l'aiguille dégueulasse.
Tu connais ces boîtes noires  indestructibles dans les avions...
POURQUOI  est-ce qu'ils ne fabriquent pas l'avion au complet dans ce matériau ?
Parce qu'ils faut bien annoncer des morts dans les journeaux sinon c'est pas marrant...
Si voler est si sécuritaire, POURQUOI  l'aéroport s'appelle le 'terminal ?
Parce que tu as trop regardé le pestacle de Gad Elmaleh !
Et toujours...
POURQUOI est-ce  qu'on appuie plus fort sur les touches de la télécommande quand les piles sont presque à plat ?
Parce qu'on veut faire comprendre a la télécommande qu'on est vénère.
POURQUOI est-ce qu'on lave  nos serviettes de bain ; est-ce qu'on n'est pas sensés être propres quand on  s'essuie avec ?
Parce que tu te lave pas assez bien, regarde, moi je me bloque la salle de bain deux heure mais je ne lave jamais mes serviettes et elles sentent toujours bon la pomme.
POURQUOI les pilotes  kamikazes portent-ils un casque?
Parce que les pilotes kamikazes que tu connais espèrent s'en sortir vivant.
Questions cruciales :
Quand on étrangle un Schtroumpf, il devient de quelle couleur ?
Rose (hein Zoé?)
Comment les panneaux ' DÉFENSE DE MARCHER SUR LA PELOUSE '  arrivent-ils au milieu de celles-ci ?
Parce qu'ils ont planté les panneau avant la pelouse.
Quand l'homme a découvert que la vache donnait du lait, que cherchait-il exactement à  faire à ce moment-là ?
Et tu crois pas que l'homme a vu que le veau têtai la vache? On sait tous que la connerie humaine est grande mais quand même...
Si un mot dans le  dictionnaire est mal écrit, comment s'en apercevra-t-on ?
ça serait horrible, il y aurait un krach boursier une 3ème guerre mondiale et l'académie franaçaise ferait un coup d'état pour être sur que 'ornithorynque' s'écrit bien avec un Y.
POURQUOI ce couillon de Noé n'a-t-il pas  écrasé les deux moustiques ?
Soit parce qu'il était occupé à donner a manger a 82 236 autres animaux et il s'en foutait des 2 moustiques.
Soit parce qu'il était sado-maso.
Est-ce que les ouvriers de chez Lipton ont aussi une pause café ?
Oui
POURQUOI les moutons ne rétrécissent pas quand il pleut  ?
Et toi ton cerveau rétrécit devant un ordi? (moi oui)
POURQUOI 'séparés' s'écrit-il en un mot,  alors que 'tous ensemble' s'écrit en deux mots séparés  ?
NAN MAIS ATTENDS JE VAIS M'ÉNERVER LA !! PARCE QUE "ENSEMBLE" ET "TOUS SÉPARÉS" ÇA MARCHE PAS PEUT-ÊTRE?
Je veux acheter un boomerang neuf : comment puis-je me débarrasser de l'ancien ?
Bah tu le met à la poubelle mon con.
POURQUOI Les établissements ouverts 24 heures sur 24 ont-ils des  serrures et des
verrous ?
ETÂ LEÂ DROITÂ DEÂ GREVEÂ ALORS?
Enfin une question intéressante...
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